Sorrow to Rage

I sit here right now as i think of my sorrow,
Using my mind as a checklist more ticks that crosses,
Lifestyle of a broken man, torn to pieces by upset,
I keep running things over in an overcrowded brain,
It feels like im in permanent overdrive not stopping,
Did i deserve all of this misfortune in this short time.

As i remember the things that hurt me the most,
Im still stuck as a child in my own mind,
Still a boy needing answers to questions,
Walking the streets in my mind with nowhere to call home,
Home is a word i used to take for granted,
Now even the permanent has became a solemn imperfection.

My childhood has been dismantled and reassembled,
All thats left is a jumbled puzzle with pieces missing,
The most important pieces are all incomplete or gone,
Born into a unsealed box the contents of which unchecked,
Not realising until it mattered that my life is shattered,
Due to my fates gradual destruction leading to my new self.

Often i sit just staring into pure nothingness,
Realising that these imperfections will always be imminent,
Prominantly sticking out in a hate stricken life,
Anger managment unmanaged as i turn to inner rage,
This rage cannot be verified as i weaken with passing days,
I appear so drained and tired to a world permanently awake.


Copyright (c) Matthew Neville 2005